To think, graduation is today- the same day as the rapture.
Funny how things work out sometimes I guess.
Its even stranger to think that the day I graduate is a little less than 365 days from now. Time never ceases to fly for me these past few years. Junior year is over. Age eighteen is fast approaching. 2012 draws nearer and nearer. Yet, I wonder if I’m ready for this sort of thing; living on my own, not having to tell anyone where I am going, having no one to answer to.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my parents to death. However, it sure will be nice not having to ask them to hang out with people once I am at university.
I wonder if my 4.3 gpa will get me anywhere. I wonder if my work ethic is up to par. I wonder who I will meet, who my roommate will be, and what school I will go to.
All of this wondering for something that isn’t even here yet. It seems close, but it still is far off.
Never in my life have I been this excited, this ready, this terrified, or this questioning about my existence.
“Saying ‘I notice you’re a nerd’ is like saying, ‘Hey, I notice that you’d rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you’d rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?’ In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even ‘lame’ is kind of lame. Saying ‘You’re lame’ is like saying ‘You walk with a limp.’ Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he’s done all right for himself." - John Green”—
“Imagining the future is some kind of a nostalgia. You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you’ll escape it one day, and how awesome it will be, and imagining that future keeps you going, but you never do it. You just use the future to escape the present.”- John Green’s Looking for Alaska
I believe he’s right; imagining the future IS a kind of nostalgia for someone who is too impatient or tired of the present. As the time comes for certain people to take a large step in their lives, I can’t help but wish I was in their place. You see, friends of mine are graduating and will leave for college in the fall and, as a young person, I dream of being in the same position.
When you are young, you wish you were older. When you are in high school, you wish you were in college. In dreaming of these futures, one forgets to enjoy experiences right in front of them. One can use the past to escape the present, and the future to escape the present as well.
As much as I yearn for my life to continue to this step in which many of my friends are taking, I hope I will be able to enjoy the last year of high school without concentrating too much on the future.
Nostalgia can help one remember, but it can make someone forget how to enjoy what is happening right in front of them.
All in all, the future will always be tempting as a means of escape from the present but all we can do is remember where are feet are placed- in the now.